Waffle Madness!
by GothKat2SlashFan
Summary: CRACK. Oneshot. What happens when you throw  tons and tons  of sugar, a bunch of OCs, and very OOC cats onto an unnamed island? Well, this. Written under influence of sugar, flames not welcome.


**Title: Waffle Madness!**

**This is… I don't even know what this is. I wrote this a (_longlonglong_) time ago, so… Bleh. Very cracky. Flames will be used as my excuse for not doing homework. This made me laugh when I found it, so I hope it makes someone else laugh, too.**

Firestar: Hey Graystripe, what's THAT?

Graystripe: It's a... WAFFLE!

Firestar: ...what? what's a waf...wa...whatever that thing is?

Ravenpaw: A WAFFLE IS A WAFFLE!

Firestar: What? I need a description!

Cloudpaw: YOU EATED MY COOKIEEEEE! GIVE IT BAAAAAAAAAACK!

Firestar: So? That's a cookie, and I can't give it back, it's in my tummy, do you want to KILL your UNCLE?

Tigerstar: YOU'RE NOT MY UNCLE AND YES I WANT TO KILL YOU!

Firestar: Tigerstar... you're a ghost, you can't possibly kill me...

Hawkfrost: I CAN KILL YOU!

Squirrelflight: BRAMBLECLAW! You were supposed to kill Hawkfrost in 'Sunset'!

Brambleclaw: ...uh...ok...

Brambleclaw: *clears throat* Hey, um, Hawkfrost! I won't let you kill Firestar, I'll kill you instead!

Firestar: ? I'm still here you know!

Tigerstar: Not much longer!

Tigerstar & Hawkfrost: *leap at Firestar*

Ashfur: WHY AM I HERE?

Jayfeather: ... isn't Ravenpaw supposed to be with Barley back at the old camp?

Barley: I'm here! *waves*

Ravenpaw: DON'T DISTRACT US FROM THE WAFFLES!

Ravenpaw: Wait a sec... *sniffs* where'd the waffle go?

Cloudpaw: *points at Graystripe* HE ATE IT! AND HE DIDN'T GIVE ME ANY!

Lionblaze: Wait, why do we have our warrior names but CloudTAIL doesn't?

Brightheart: No idea. I'm a warrior though!

Swiftpaw: Me too!

Ashfur: SOMEONE GET ME OUTTA HERE!

Lionblaze: Go help Firestar first!

Jayfeather: Don't fight, I don't have enough herbs for all of you!

Hollyleaf: Hi! Hi! HELLO ANYONE THERE? *pulls Jayfeather's tail*

Jayfeather: WTF? Hollyleaf...? Aren't you, like, supposed to be in StarClan?

Hollyleaf: Nope!

Sandstorm: WHY ARE YOU ALL JUST SITTING AROUND? FIRESTAR'S GOING TO BE KILLED!

Rock: Nope.

Ravenpaw: WAFFLEEEESSSSSSSS!

Brambleclaw: Uh... Squirrelflight?

Squirrelflight: What? *pokes Hawkfrost*

Hawkfrost: HEY! *glares at Squirrelflight*

Squirrelflight: Oops, wrong brother.

Ashfur: *starts banging head*

Jayfeather: *yanks Ashfur's tail*

Breezepelt: DIE JAYFEATHER!

Jayfeather: Wha? Where did YOU come from?

Honeyfern: It's the DARK FOREST, duh!

Cloudtail: What, and StarClan's real? Yeah right!

Brindleface: It's real, Cloudtail!

Cloudtail: *O.O* Brindleface!

Sandstorm: SANDSTORM TO THE RESCUE!

Firestar: Great, thanks for ruining the cookies.

Sandstorm: What? *storms off*

Tigerstar: We were having a nice chat until SHE came along.

Firestar: True.

Leafpool: CROWFEATHER?

Crowfeather: LEAFPOOL?

Nightcloud: I DO NOT APPROVE! *pushes Leafpool into lake*

Leafpool: *shakes off water* Crowfeather doesn't even LIKE you, Nightcloud!

Nightcloud: *starts stalking towards Leafpool*

Crowfeather: *points into trees* FOX!

Nightcloud: What? Where?

Leafpool: OVER THERE!

Nightcloud: *hisses and turns*

Leafpool: *pushes Nightcloud into lake* HA!

Breezepelt: DON'T PUSH MY MOM!

Lionblaze: NO ATTACKING LEAFPOOL!

Jayfeather: *growls* NO ONE FIGHT! I DON'T HAVE ANY HERBS!

Lionblaze: I can't get hurt remember? The prophecy isn't done yet!

Lionblaze & Breezepelt: *start fighting*

Hollyleaf: Stupid damn prophecy.

Jayfeather: You're right.

Jayfeather: *yanks Lionblaze's tail*

Lionblaze: OW! *glares at Jayfeather* You really do love pulling cat's tails don't you!

Jayfeather: Yup! *smiles evilly* And I'm going to do it again and again!

Lionblaze: RUUUUUUUUUUUN HOLLYLEAF! LETS GO!

Hollyleaf: *shakes head* No, I'm staying here. You go.

Breezepelt: AHAHAHA I'M GOING TO FOLLOW YOU!

Yellowfang: STALKER!

Silverstream: Breezepelt's weird...

Feathertail: But he is one of Crowfeather's sons...

Graystripe: *O.O* Silverstream! And Feathertail...

Stormfur: Hi Dad!

Graystripe: *keels over in shock* STORMFUR?

Stormfur, Silverstream and Feathertail: GRAYSTRIPE! NOOO!

Ravenpaw: Here, have a waffle Graystripe!

Silverstream: How's that supposed to help?

Cloudpaw: WHERE DID YOU GET THE WAFFLE?

Ravenpaw: *runs off carrying the waffle*

Graystripe: *sits up suddenly* WAFFLE? WHERE?

Feathertail: Yay! Dad you're awake!

Stormfur: We thought you were going to join StarClan!

Graystripe: Not that soon...

Cloudpaw: *chases after Ravenpaw* GIMME THAT WAFFLE!

Icestar: HEY CLOUDPAW!

Cloudpaw: Who are YOU?

Icestar: I'm Icestar, leader of NightClan!

Nightbreeze: And I'm her deputy, Nightbreeze!

Hazelpaw: Hi!

Dawnfur: I'm Dawnfur, her mother.

Firestar: Whoa, I don't remember you being mentioned by StarClan!

Icestar: That's because we're OCs.

Firestar: THERE AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE OCS IN WARRIORS! *starts banging head*

Hawkfrost: DIE FIRESTAR!

Sasha: Don't be so mean to the ThunderClan LEADER!

Firestar: lolwut.

Jayfeather: FIRESTAR DO YOU NEED MENTAL HELP?

Firestar: No but I think Cloudtail Ravenpaw Barley and Graystripe do.

Jayfeather: O.o

Cloudtail: COOKIES! AND WAFFLES! WHITE CHOCOLATE MACADAMIA CHIP!

Firestar: That just proved my point.

Ravenpaw: NO WAFFLES FOR CLOUD-

Cloudtail: *steals Ravenpaw's waffle*

Cloudtail: MWAHAHAHA! yum~

Ravenpaw: *starts crying* GIMME THAT!

Firestar: STOP! Can't you guys just share?

Barley: NEVER!

Firestar: O.o

Firestar: *snatches waffle*

Firestar: Lemme divide it!

Scourge: *snatches waffle* MINEEEEEEEEEEE

Firestar: NO FAIR! *starts crying* I KILLED YOU! NO FAIR!

Scourge: YOU DIDN'T KILL ME! Nightclaw saved me! *waves to Nightclaw* thx!

Firestar: WTF IS THAT?

Scourge: My mate.

Squirrelflight: O.O

Nightclaw: Why am I here?

Scourge: Because I wanted the waffle.

Nightclaw: I'M GOING HOME!

Firestar: *snatches waffle from Scourge*

Scourge, Graystripe, Ravenpaw and Cloudtail: NOOOOOOOOO!

Firestar: *eats waffle*

Scourge, Graystripe, Ravenpaw and Cloudtail: WHYY!~

Firestar: Now you don't need to fight!

Scourge, Graystripe, Ravenpaw and Cloudtail: *start crying*

Dawnfur: If you want that waffle so much, why don't you go be kittypets?

Icestar: Hey, CLOUDTAIL!

Cloudtail: *spins around* wut?

Icestar: WANT THIS COOKIE? *stuffs Oreo into mouth

Cloudtail: GIMME THAT! *pulls Icestar's tail*

Brambleclaw: Cloudtail's fighting with an OC? Weird.

Squirrelflight: Yup.

Lionblaze: Are the OCs on crack?

Jayfeather: Probably.

Brambleberry: SAY THAT TO MY FACE, YOU LAME MEDICINE CAT!

Jayfeather: WTF r you?

Lionblaze: She's probably another OC.

Brambleberry: I'm the medicine cat apprentice for NightClan, Brambleberry! AND I'M PROUD OF IT!

Jayfeather: You're probably hyped up on sugar, honey and catnip. Oh, and poppy seeds.

Cloudtail: GIMME THAT COOKIE ALREADY!

Icestar: Too late loser! I ATE it!

Cloudtail: NOOOOOOOOO!

Cloudtail: *starts crying*

Icestar: *grins evilly*

Dawnfur: ICESTAR! Don't be so mean!

Icestar: What? I'm an OC and HE's just a boring old kittypet!

Goldenleaf: Are you laughing at my apprentice Jayfeather?

Jayfeather: Great! ANOTHER OC!

Lionblaze: I'm leaving.

Hollyleaf: Weren't you already gone?

Ashfur: SOMEONE GET ME OUT OF HEREEEEEEE!

Brambleclaw: Hey, Ashfur, did you get to go to StarClan or are you lumped in with the Dark Forest?

Ashfur: OBVIOUSLY I'm in StarClan!

Brambleclaw: No, we're all standing on another weird island in the middle of a giant lake. This doesn't look like StarClan...

Petalfur: Yay, a lake! *starts splashing around*

Dovewing: Petalfur is weird.

Lionblaze: I thought you wanted to be her friend.

Dovewing: Nah, she's too weird.

Petalpelt: Who are you calling weird?

Dovewing: Um, you, you WEIRD OC.

Petalpelt: I'm Petalpelt!

Nightbreeze: ICESTAR! Stop fighting with Cloudtail! He doesn't have nine lives!

Icestar: Awwww! Fine, then I'll go with him to the Moonstone and we'll poke it!

Cloudtail: *shakes head* Never mind. Where's the ThunderClan camp?

Goldenleaf: This is the NIGHTCLAN camp!

Sunkit: Yeah! So get out of here!

Candy: Sunkit! *picks up Sunkit* Sorry Cloudtail.

Firestar: I'm leaving! There are too many OCs!

Icestar: Well, unless you can swim and see in pitch-black darkness, I don't think you're going anywhere right now.

Ravenpaw: What? Why?

Dawnfur: Because our camp is surrounded with lots of small streams and the trees are incredibly thick there. There's a way out, but there's no way we're telling you.

Cloudtail: Awwww! I don't like swimming!

Graystripe: I THINK I can swim... It's been a while...

Silverstream, Feathertail and Stormfur: We'll help you.

Hazelpaw: Dawnfur, can you PLEASE teach me to swim? I can't quite stay afloat that long...

Dawnfur: Just use the passa- it.

Hazelpaw: Awww... PLEAAAAAAAAAAASE~

Dawnfur: Fine. But not now, there are other clan cats in the camp.

Ravenpaw: How do we get out? PLEASE tell us!~

Nightbreeze and Icestar: No.

Barley: Say, where'd you get the waffle Graystripe?

Graystripe: From the kittypet in the nursery.

Silverstream: *gasp* YOU LOVE SOMEONE ELSE! *breaks down crying*

Graystripe: No! She just tossed me a waffle from somewhere behind her!

Silverstream: *runs off into NightClan territory*

Tigerstar: I'm leaving. I found the exit! Coming, Firestar, Hawkfrost, Brambleclaw?

Brambleclaw: Sorry, not without Squirrelflight.

Firestar: I'm coming!

Crowfeather: I think Nightcloud drowned.

Scourge: Which way is Twolegplace?

Nightclaw: Come on, mouse-brain. This way.

Scourge: Yay! Nightclaw came back!

Scourge: Bye Firestar!

Nightclaw and Scourge: *walk back to Twolegplace talking*

***dives under table* I know that's not a real ending… Let's just put… OMAKE?**

**R&R!**


End file.
